I feel the need to fight

I feel the need to fight this anxiety and the fluctuations of depression that started last week.  Currently, usually I only take one trazadone for help sleeping.  The last two nights, I have needed two in order to sleep.  I think it is due to the added stress of not working regularly and too much idle time on my hands.  My OCD is not centered on obsessing over running out of my meds because I am doubling up when it is only written for one a night.  Then my OCD says I need to obsess through the day about the sleep issue.  As I write this out and read it on the screen, what I am obsessing about seems very silly.  But isn’t that what OCD is about?  Obsessions about things that sound silly when said out loud and it is not worth it overall?  They are not supposed to make sense, being that is the illness itself.  Going to call my doctors office today, to get into seeing my pyschiatrist earlier than my next regular appointment to address all the bipolar rapid cycling of recent.  Then I can address the sleep issue.  Seems I have been doing a lot of the what if obsessions and the obsessions that you seem to think all is doomed due to one issue.  I was fine and sleeping fine while working, now it is all different.  Ok, thanks for listening.  Anyone go through something similar?

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