A decision has been made

Today I made the decision to attend a day treatment program.  The earliest they could get me in was Tuesday and it is for ten days, weekdays.  Nothing is working, didn’t make it to work today.  Had a few crying spells.  My insurance set it up while on the phone with me and the facility, and my intake is Monday at 3pm.  I have never done this before but my therapist had talked about it a few times and I couldn’t make the plunge.  At first I felt like a loser and falling behind in life compared to others but a lot of others are not dealing with my issues at all.  This gives me hope compared to before this, just wish I could start tomorrow.  Had to let my job know and they asked if they could hold my job for me?  I was dumbfounded because I did not expect that, I told them I had to think about it.  So there it is.  The best thing that happened today was that I walked a neighbor’s dog today and got paid and I actually felt normal and good.  Wish I could do that more often as she has me only doing it twice a week, thirty minute walks, ten dollars a walk.

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