Why is it my depression is always on my mind? Do not want to face the next day, shower, leave the house , always seem bored despite several things I try. The pain does not go away, I keep trying real hard everyday. I feel like I get confused easily and not of a sharp mind. What am I supposed to do? I tried the day program and did not get the results I wanted.
You mean the DSM was written about me?
Random, amusing, sporatic, with thrills of my life ruminating through my diagnoses.
You mean the DSM was written about me? 
I’m struggling lately too.
Btw, I’m at a new site if you want to follow again – mymindhatesme.wordpress.com
If you do stop by, you will see I had an emotionally hellish weekend.
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Why are you at a new site
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Miranda’s husband (soon to be ex?) found my site so I had to make it private in order to protect her.
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I am having a torteous day, have not been sleeping well for four days, do not want to leave the house. Home alone because my husband is at work.
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Yeah, I’m often stuck between wanting to just stay in my room and wanting to be out of the house completely. I don’t feel well either, sick and stressed about work.
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At least your able to leave the house.
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I HAVE to. I force it upon myself. THIS job makes me do it. After moving here in August, there were numerous days when I wouldn’t even step outside except to let my dog out.
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I wonder if I will even make it to my doctors appointment tomorrow. Do not know what he can do for me.
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I wish I had some advice for you. Sometimes I just MAKE myself function because I’m more afraid of NOT functioning. Weekends like the one I just had scare the hell out of me though.
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I did not function today or sunday, preffered being safe on the couch and under the covers.
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I SHOULD have done that on Saturday AND Sunday. I basically did that on Friday.
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How are you holding up? It’s been awhile.
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Omg i am up to 150 on lamictal, not much of a change. He raised it to 175 for two days then 200 until I see him again on monday. It still is a monumental task to get ready in the morning and goto work. Had a good part of the day yesterday. Do not want to go to work tomm. I can now cry which beforei felt like crying and could not. Came home, showered and been laying on the couch. Feels like basic tasks are too much work every day.
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I am on 300mg of Lamictal. I’m still struggling as well. Started crying at work today, luckily it was in a private place.
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Great i hope it works for me better
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Well, it is really my situational struggles that made me cry. I am on a cocktail too, not just the Lamictal.
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I am really hoping that this will work. I went to a tms therapy consult , apparently my insurance pays for all of it. But cannot start til I am back from a week in florida soon. They do sessions five days a week for 36 sessions and it has to be consecutive.
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That’s pretty intensive therapy. I think I would probably find some benefit in a month long therapy thing…but I just can’t do it.
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What is new with you?
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Not too much, same struggles as always.
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I feel like I am not getting better even though I am doing everything I am supposed to do, so why dont I feel better?
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Because you have severe depression and anxiety. At least that is what I’m always told. Are you just on Lamictal or something else too?
I’m on Lamictal, Vyvanse, Zoloft, and Risperidone…and I still feel like shit most days. I have an appt next month with a psychiatrist to see about adjusting my medications.
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Latuda, paxil, vyvanse
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I am told i have a bipolar depression
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Yup, that’s pretty much what I have. It is rather awful. At times I feel like it’s a death sentence.
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Like wtf, supposed to go on vacation on the 24th and how am I supposed to enjoy it?
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I am able to have a few moments of happiness here and there. I find it’s when I’m not thinking about anything and just being in the moment. The minute my brain starts connecting with my emotions it’s all over for me and I go down the rabbit hole.
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I feel like the depression is always there
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I feel that way too
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Sometimes it’s just more manageable than others.
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