Damn

For the past week, I had went from improving with my ocd and feeling happy about it to a depression.  The kind of depression that leaves you not wanting to work, hard to complete errands because doing them involves begging yourself to get off the couch and go, but your mind says that is boring and not interesting.  Today, I actually did some errands and doing them were painful.  For the past week, I have been watching hbo series a lot to occupy my mind.  It is like this sad feeling has permanently moved into my head.  Then my ocd runs with it and ruminates about why I am sad or depressed.  Just feel awful all around.  What disturbs me the most is the lack of drive to do things.  Apathy is what is killing me.  I am struggling day to day and it amazes me how much my mind fights back doing chores or errands, or even showering.  Saw my therapist , and just getting ready and driving there was awful.  Our actual session went well and I felt a lot better talking to her.  I see my doctor on Monday .  We have been doing med changes and this started after decreasing one med and dropping another.  I am worried I will get worse.  I do not want to just feel numb all the time, that was awful.

Anyone want to share a similar story?

 

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